Wedding Jitters Are Coming…Here’s How to Handle Them

Right before the wedding, some funny things happen. Most people either lean or get ‘jitters’ just thinking about the day ahead. There are many emotions going on all at the same time. You may start to second-guess things about your wedding day altogether. That doesn’t mean you picked the wrong person. It means you’re standing at the edge of a real life shift. Cold feet don’t always mean stop. Sometimes cold feet mean you care. I know this to be true—marriage is not a party, it’s a life change. New roles. New responsibilities. New mirrors.  Your nerves will feel it before you do. Why do your nerves show up on your big day? What I have also found to be true is that most people aren’t scared of love. So why do most people get 'jitters' on that day? What brings on wedding nervousness?

What are most people concerned of are:

• Losing themselves

• Repeating what they watched growing up

• Failing publicly

• Choosing once and choosing wrong

  
  

You’re not just saying “I do” to a person. You’re saying yes to a version of life you haven’t lived yet. That’ll make anyone’s nerves kick in.

Know the Difference Between Cold Feet vs. Red Flags

  Wedding "Jitters" sound like: Red flags sound like:

Can I really do this? I don’t feel safe telling the truth

Am I ready for forever? I’m not being true myself

This feels like a lot I hope they change

One is fear of change. The other is your gut warning you. Don’t mix them up.

How to Move Forward Without Panicking

1. Slow the moment down-You don’t have to figure everything out in the moment. Take a breath.  Feel where you are, Take your time making decisions

2. Say the quiet part out loud- Fear grows in silence. Talk to someone grounded—not someone dramatic. A therapist, coach, or elder who won’t project their trauma onto you.

3. Separate fear from facts!  Ask yourself:

• Is this about us or about me?

• Is this old stuff or present reality?

• Am I scared to commit—or scared to show who I really am?

Getting cold feet...wedding 'jitters' 'doesn’t disqualify you from love.  It qualifies you as human. The goal is not to feel fearless. The goal is to move forward honestly, and clarity.  Choosing each other because it’s real, not forced—that’s love. Don’t let nerves make the final call.